If there is a true keeper of the magical unicorn forest, it would be Aquarius. It's really hard to find something bad to say about the water bearer because they are so fucking cool and irresistible. Fuck you Aquarius! See, now I feel like shit.
The Good
Aquarius are over-all fun loving people. Like Libra, it is hard for them to make enemies. They will talk to anything and anyone under the sign. If there was an Emo surrounded by a group of Cholos, the Aquarius will no doubt be the first one to welcome him to the circle. Of all the Sun Signs, the Aquarius truly is the one sign that could care less about what you think of them or their decisions, and the least to brag about it.
The Bad
The only bad thing about an Aquarius is that there is really nothing that bad I can say about them. Bastards.
Relationships
Aquarius Man: Aquarius men are notorious for doing the "friends first" thing before they get into a serious relationship. They will hardly waste their time with a female that they can't have a stimulating conversation with. Aquarians and Sagi's are the most immune to woman's cries of emotional neediness.
Aquarius Woman: There really isn't that much difference here from their male counterparts. Like the Aquarius Man, the women will not bother with a brainless mutant, and will want to get to know their potential partner on a friend basis first. Don't ever get caught repeating a stupid pick-up line. The Aquarius Woman owns the No-Nonsense Cafe, and they will not be buying your line of bullshit today. Creativity is key.
Aquarius and Sex
Aquarius Man: Unpredictable. Most Aquarius Men are exciting and uninhibited lovers. You just never know with them. Just always be ready for action. The best part of having an Aquarius Man as a lover, is that you can truly be yourself around him. Since they are blinded by social norms, nothing is too weird or too simple to try. It's all about you and where you both are mentally.
Aquarius Woman: Again, there isn't much difference with the female water bearer. The better your friendship or bonding experience, the better the sex. Just don't expect to get some after an emotional argument. Aquarius in general cannot be bothered with neediness and emotion during sex. It will take forever and a day for them to even consider having a serious relationship with you, so cut it out and save that shit for later.
How to get rid of a Aquarius
Lie all the time. Be conservative. Ask for emotional support. Be clingy.
Advice for Aquarius
Stop being so fucking cool.
They're assumptious idiots, talk way too much (usually about nothing, or shit you don't give a single fuck about), are really annoying, really fake, kind of vain (lol, says a lot about this guy here), really distant from everyone because they think they're "too cool," when in reality they're just insecure, most of the time have no clue what they're saying, extremely overbearing, usually think their shit don't stink, are awful judges of character, too quick to make friends with people they don't know, are generally really boring people, and have a horrible habit for acting better than they really are (self-lying)...
ReplyDeleteThere you go, bro. Thought you needed some insight on how awful this sign really is ~ =D
And if you're an Aquarius... I'm not surprised. :\
Hahahaha!!! The writer of this blog must be an Aquarius! That's quite amusing to me.
ReplyDeleteNo sign is this flawless! Every rose has its thorn bitch. Not one negative trait? Bitch Please... I was raised with Aquarius natives.
The men think they know EVERYTHING, and the women are lying cheating crazy skanks and con artists. My experiences:
My sister was Aquarius and had loads of sex problems. Talk about needing freedom! Bitch couldn't keep her legs closed and fucked anything that walked! She got pregnant 3 TIMES. And aborted ALL THREE OF THEM.
I'm not against abortion, but I'm sorry, if you don't want a baby then maybe you should stop being such a god damn whore.
I got a rare beanie baby and talked to her about it. She didn't give a fuck about the bear until I mentioned it was worth $62,000. Then she tried to pull the "You stole it from me it was mine!" Fucking cons I tell you
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ReplyDeleteNeighbor was Aquarius. Beat her dog every day. (I told you I grew up around Aquarius bitches) she literally got a new dog every 6 months off of KSL so she could beat them to pieces. Lots of dogs went missing and I swear to god she probably murdered them and buried them in her backyard. Someone needs to check her KLS records! She's bought so many dogs on there and they literally all go missing 6 months later.
ReplyDeleteShe came to my house and pretended to be my friend then asked for my belongings.
Two faced psychopath.
Please do more research before you call a Sun sign flawless and perfect with no negative traits. If anything this sign is the most crazy.
ReplyDeleteLol I am an aquarius and I am shocked and disappointed at this. Either you didn't do enough research or you've never had the pleasure of actually knowing an aquarius. We are very sensitive but at the same time Emotinally detached (mostly to avoid getting feelings hurt), prefer to just be left alone when upset, queens of the silent treatment when mad, holds in feelings but explode when it builds up and when we explode you'd probably wish it was a scorpio you were fighting with instead because it's that bad. Detached. Aquarius will never admit to being wrong or say sorry, if I know I'm wrong I'll put in the effort to convince the person I'm right before I admit it, manipulative, did I say detached? But yeah we are the best and coolest sign in my opinion ;0) everything else you said about aquarius was on point except the (nothing bad part) and the (how to get rid of an aquarius) section hit the nail on the head! I fucking love your horoscope page, best ever!!!
ReplyDeleteHow to get rid of a Aquarius
ReplyDeleteLie all the time. Be conservative. Ask for emotional support. Be clingy ������ trying to get rid of the one I have. Too many guys friends. Also they barely keep females friends. It's sick cause it you, Joe, Anthony, and Chris. They just sicking !!!
Awesome! i agree with this! 5 stars mate!
ReplyDeleteHaters gonna fucking hate! GTFO Earth and Water signs! you all fucking jealous! haha! those hating comments above, too funny. haha!
ReplyDelete